Star Wars: Episode III - Meh

The long awaited and much anticipated final episode in the generation spanning epic, Star Wars, is already becoming news worthy. After long, arduous meetings between creator and once great idea ruiner George Lucas and producers, the official title is decided upon.

The upcoming and, with thanks to God almighty, final film will be titled Star Wars: Episode III- Meh.

Tossing aside previous suggestions from studio executives like Episode III – Who Cares?, Episode III – Anything That Was Once Good About Star Wars Has Been Flushed Down The Toilet, and Episode III – Revenge of the Sith, Lucas remained intransigent in his battle to not let his beautiful and pure vision be tainted by hackneyed marketing schemes.

I managed to track Mr. Lucas down at his luxurious California home and drag him away from his already busy schedule for a few questions about his recent victory.

Shizhead: Before we begin, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to speak to some, uh, fans?

George Lucas: (Simulating a futuristic dog fight with a still in the box Millennium Falcon and a near-mint Tie Fighter) Peew! Peew! Peew! Peew! RAAAAAOOOR… WHOOOOSH. TAH TAH TAH TAH TAAAAH…

SH: …

GL: (pointing to a picture of him and ex-wife Marcia Lucas) It’s the ship that made the castle run in less than twelve parsecs…

SH: Right, right… so, Mr. Lucas. How do you feel about your victory over the studio in regards to the title of Episode III?

GL: Aren’t you a little short for a Stormtrooper?

SH: Uh... moving on. What do you have to say to the fans that are, let’s say, less than satisfied with your films in the last few years?

GL: I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

SH: Oooookay… I’m just going to let myself out.

GL: R2-D2, is it you? It is you!

I managed to get out of there unscathed… for now. I guess we’ll see what major damage is caused when and if my time is reluctantly despoiled by one more giant disappointment upon the "film's" release.