Land Of The Free, Home Of The Idiot

It seems the recent decision to lower the unavailing Terror Alert from Holy Shit Orange to Watch Your Ass Yellow has had some repercussions. In late April, a 22-year old man, Gregory Despres, was stopped by customs trying to cross over from Canada into the US with a carload of weapons. He was carrying a homemade sword with a swastika, two sets of brass knuckles, a hatchet, a flack jacket, and a chainsaw that was covered in "what appeared to be blood." After explaining that he was "on a secret mission for the President", his weapons were taken, and he was permitted to enter the US. The next day, a senor citizen couple living next door to his shack in Canada was found hacked to pieces. It was assumed to be Despres who murdered the couple.

No shit assholes!

You think, possibly, that the asshole carrying, amongst other things, a blood soaked chainsaw, "might" be the one responsible for cutting off the head of his neighbor? Nice detective work, dipshits.

Am I the only one that finds it utterly disheartening that a person carrying weapons, some complete with blood, can get across our borders, yet most of us can't get into the lobby of an airport with out someone checking out stool for drugs? Yah for suckurity!

When questioned about the lack of detainment of Despres, Bill Anthony, a spokesperson for Border Control, stated, "Nobody asked us to detain him. Being bizarre is not a reason to keep somebody out of this country or lock them up." He also added, "Our people don't have a crime lab up there. They can't look at a chain saw and decide if it's blood or rust or red paint."

Holy shit! Are you serious? Being bizarre isn't a reason to arrest people, sure. Plus, lots of people spill red paint on their chainsaws. Kiss my ass! I've been yanked out of my car by a gung-ho, power hungry cop using what little authority he has to make up for his shortcomings. Then forced through ridiculous questioning and a full search simply because I was young and driving a crappy car in a nice area. Yet crossing over a national border with an insane look, several weapons, and what COULD be blood is no reason to detain someone? Wow. Apparently simply thinking the leader of another country has dangerous weapons is enough to warrant a full scale invasion on said country, but a crazed jack-ass wielding homemade weapons and a shirt with "brown and red stains" is no cause for alarm.

Amazing. Utterly amazing.

Since you're wondering, it turns out he killed his neighbors over some dispute they were having over a fence. Makes sense. Good thing the Border Control wasn't too pushy when he tried to cross. That might have gotten ugly.